Category: House

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Bourgeois Booze

It’s funny – I remember a line in The Catcher in the Rye where the whiny social commentator protagonist reflects on the overuse of the term “bourgeois” and his disdain for those who use it. If memory serves, and I’m not looking this up to verify right now, it’s the adjective form of Bourgeoisie – the rising merchant middle class in France, which at the time was a new concept in their history of traditional peasant/aristocrat societal roles. Acting bourgeois was attempting to be aristocratic, sans-title, through money alone. It’s not difficult to find modern examples of this behavior, ergo the term’s continued prevalence today (though I doubt many who use the term could provide so eloquent a definition).

But like the whiny Holden Caufield, I agree with its overuse. Worse, we’ve dumbed down the pronunciation. “Bougie” is its contemporary variant, which I quite frankly find to sound uneducated, although that may be the point, seeing as the term is only used in the context of punching up. The well-off might suffer delusions of nobility, but the social elites have no need to acknowledge those beneath them at all. The term’s usage, therefore, appears to be reserved for those at the bottom, who berate those slightly above them for perceived snootiness.

A modern variant is the Yuppie, of which I myself have been previously accused. When you rise above, there’s jealousy by former equals, and in flow accusations of ostentation, no matter how seemingly benign. Oh well. I’ll file that away for future analysis after I drink this bourbon, which I’ve placed on our new home-made bougie Yuppie liquor shelves!:

I lamented just recently on how difficult it is to find well-made niche products, and how the better alternative is to instead build it oneself. This applied, unexpectedly, to some very basic shelving as well, which was needed to more efficiently store liquor that did not fit upon the cabinet with the rest. Some stained oak planks and mounting hardware solved the problem. Additional storage built. For storage.

…And maybe to display some of the nicer stuff. There’s the Bougie factor, I suppose. Guilty after all.

–Simon

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Gardens and Greenspace

Let’s do some outdoor updates, yeah!

The squash patch which was new last year proved to be one garden too many to maintain, so it’s been converted into a pollinator patch, with every annual flower seed I had in my collection and wanted to clear out, plus clover.
A new maple, to bring back some frontyard shade.
Indeterminate tomatoes went in.
And a new sugar maple for the backyard.
Determinate tomatoes and sunflowers.

And that was Mother’s Day.

–Simon

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Appliance Augmentations

When a big ticket item needs purchasing, a person should contemplate and thoroughly research available replacement products that are on the market. Making an informed decision not only increases the chances of finding a selection that most appropriately fits the user’s needs, but also decreases the chance of choosing a product that emphasizes form and marketing over proper function and longevity.

Of course, there are other schools of thought.

And so Liz bought a new stove.

The old stove – the one that came with the house – had started acting funny. The right burners would fail to keep a set temperature, then randomly switch to high. This resulted in boiled over rice and pasta, and swearing. Then the burner wouldn’t turn off. Many problems, Whirlpool.

Of course the prior homeowners didn’t tile the entire area behind the stove, either. And the new stove, with its frontal controls (an obvious layout decision, so one doesn’t have to reach over boiling pots to operate the appliance), lacked an integrated backsplash.

So then we had to add one.

Okay, that problem was solved. But guess what? The outlet isn’t recessed, so this stove, lacking the backsplash control panel, doesn’t sit flush against the wall because of the outlet gap. This left an inch in which any manner of objects could fall behind.

So after some joint brainstorming that involved overthinking potential solutions, the internet revealed that there are products specifically manufactured to address this problem. Essentially a bracket that sits in the gap, mounted to L-brackets on the cabinet sides. Simple, right? Ohhh no. Because the gap bracket just floats on the mounts and popped out the instant I pushed the stove against it. So I drilled a hole through it and mounted it to the stove itself using the existing screw holes that attach the stove’s back to the unit. This held it in place while I forced the stove back against the backsplash and on top of the brackets. Jeez.

There! Finally, a nicely installed stove with backsplash and gap filler.

The appliance itself? Well, so far it heats very evenly and consistently. I’ve made some very nice bread with it. It has a lot of functions I haven’t played with, like air fryer mode and and moist baking. I’ve once again jumped forward 10 years in technology and have to figure things out again. But at least I’m not boiling things over anymore.

–Simon

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Hold Fast

A long-deprioritized project, Liz wanted old people handlebars in the tub out of concern that my father would kill himself in a failed bathing endeavor. Apparently dad’s mortality was insufficient motivation as I hadn’t gotten around to the project for years (plural). But the recent bone-shattering event, coupled with me trying to clear off the workbench, was. Plus I got a new drill, ironically from my father, and it was a chance to try it out. Time to project!

While the battery drill has lots of features, when one wants a standard drill with more power and free from battery failure issues, the corded version is the way to go.

Initially concerned with mounting procedures, as it’s impossible to drill through glazed tile, I was able to align the brackets with the grout in such a way that each end received two screws. And since the provided mounting hardware is always pitiful, I traded the plastic mounts out for heavy-duty expanding metal versions that reached through 1/4″ of tile and 3/4″ cement board.

That shouldn’t be going anywhere.

Safety protocol!

Bonus: the kid’s embarrassed we have old people handlebars in the bathroom.

Don’t fall.

–Simon