Albatross Lodge 2026

Following a visiting hiatus related to a certain broken ankle incident…

…we returned to the cottage this year. The building itself aside, the general area has taken on a new vibe. The “you can’t go home again” phrase is applicable here. The combination of time and place with its distinct parameters is simply now non-existent. There are no longer cellular dead zones. Getaway nooks on the lake have been replaced with AirBnBs and permanent residences whose gauche edifices offend the very essence of what a small lake neighborhood in Wisconsin should be, and once was. Family-owned and operated supper clubs still exist, but are losing ground to the invasion of chain restaurants. The area isn’t becoming gentrified, but rather being ground slowly into sameness by the inevitable march of investment capitalism. The cottage resists the onslaught for the time being, though as a result it now also exists out of time – the present one. It has a future, but it will be vastly different from the memories of Liz’s childhood.

However, that’s not to say such a fate is all necessarily bad. I have great hopes for its future, even if its present state is a work in progress. It needs more manpower, but I myself am too far away to regularly contribute, and when I am there I hesitate to make any executive decisions out of fear that I lack the background knowledge to do so safely, e.g. the electrical.

Oh well. I’ll do what I can. This year was pulling Romex and ductwork through the ceiling.

How old is that switch?
This is partly why I’m afraid to touch the electrical.
I hate fiberglass insulation soooo much.
But there’s a bathroom duct at long last! Just waiting for a fan to be wired.
And a kid’s old enough to do the needed yardwork! Just don’t let her touch a hedge trimmer.

Sadly, events conspired against enjoying any outdoor activities. Even if the stairs to the waterfront were completed to allow safe transit, which they aren’t yet (that’s my sister-in-law’s project), the heat index for the week hit triple-digits. And even if I were willing to tolerate that level of discomfort, fish wouldn’t be biting in those conditions either. So I paid the Wisconsin DNR $45 for nothing. You’re welcome, Wisconsin.

Then Canada started burning again.

I had never before been under “Hazardous” AQI conditions. I also haven’t been near an erupting volcano. I imagine the experiences are similar, with the exception that Wisconsin’s flatness precludes any incidences of pyroclastic flows. We didn’t auto-ignite and get buried under ash for future archaeologists to discover with plaster molds, but that fate would have seemed kind compared to the omnipresent suffocation we endured.

Look at that haze

But any day not working beats…any day working. There were some highlights. Relaxing, some sightseeing:

And yes – a genuine supper club.

To try a new place, the girls decided on Sky Club. The claim of this place, which I found to be an odd bragging point posted on the signage, was that they had the first salad bar. Even if that were true, I would still be indifferent because it’s a frigging salad bar. Whenever a restaurant offers a salad bar, I decline, because I didn’t go out to eat to have someone send me off to a counter with chopped lettuce next to a bowl of ranch on ice and make me mix the two myself. It’s very similar to my disdain for breakfast restaurants: 3000% markup on eggs and pancakes (water, flour, baking powder, baking soda, salt, buttermilk, butter, syrup). But, when in Rome, right? Or Wisconsin, rather.

In terms of salad bars, it wasn’t too bad. Different greens mixes, their own greasy bacon dressing for the spinach, cheese sauce (which didn’t make much sense aside from it being Wisconsin), and a quivering gelatinous bunt-pan mold of unknown ingredients. The latter itself made the experience worthwhile, just for the novelty. It turned out to be a quiche with chicken organs. It certainly gave us a good laugh. But even by my standards…why?

The kid, bravely giving it a try – chicken organ quiche in center bottom.

It would also turn out that the salad bar claim was true. Or rather, claimed to be true and generally accepted by the foodie community to be at least grounded in truth. How about that? I have now eaten at the first salad bar.

My stroganoff was serviceable.

Then there was a trivia night at some other random place. We did reasonable. I hate sports.

Any place with food in Wisconsin, if not a chain, is a supper club.

And there were deer, for which every driver should watch out for. The deer we passed were noticeably more street-wise than their Ohio counterparts, I’ll note. One in particular repeatedly looked both ways before crossing. Apparently it had been paying attention in gradeschool. It probably knows about stranger danger too.

And they’d have to be street-wise when albino! We have albino squirrels in Ohio and they don’t last long, and there were several deer up there still kickin’.

Is it difficult at all to hunt deer in Wisconsin?

Wisconsin just didn’t seem to like us this year. And the sky agreed, as we passed out of smoke and into Illinois’ clear air, with the universal symbol of positivity:

God’s promise to never again burn Canada to the ground?

But Wisconsin didn’t stop there. As a lingering reminder that we weren’t welcome there, the night we got home Liz suffered an allergic reaction to the air and had to spend the night in the ER.

She has an epi-pen now.

There’s good family up there, but without an emotional attachment to the place itself, it’s only a symbol now. And having been denied the outdoor activities that I’d normally partake in, combined with the kid’s increasing reluctance for any activities with her parents, the primary assets of the cottage’s location were, for me at least, rendered moot. Once the kid leaves home, it may have renewed purpose for Liz and I, but that’s down the road and, unfortunately, an unknown.

A bit of a melancholic conclusion, I suppose.

–Simon

Mushrooms (Part 5)

AI does not like to identify mushrooms. Mushrooms are difficult to identify, so I get it, but I’m also a 90s kid who saw playground equipment removed from schools and warning labels applied to coffee cups. I suspect that AI could give a probable identification, but doesn’t want the responsibility of someone poisoning themself if the identification were incorrect. So alas, despite my curiosity with this kingdom of lifeforms, I can’t fully catalog them.

But I can photograph them! Here’s some more from Easement Acres:

Hopus lionus (I hope this is the Lion’s Man I inoculated into this stump earlier this year).
Schizophyllum commune?
I know this one, because I seeded it! Stropharia rugosoannulata
Galerina marginata? AKA Funeral Bell. Might be Desarmillaria tabescens, but I’m not going to try eating them.
Some form of Crepidotus

Lots of rain bringeth lots of mushrooms. Don’t eat them, or at least don’t blame AI if you do and die.

–Simon

More Foliage!

Southwest Ohio is naturally a woodland. Suburbia fights this for what I gather are a few reasons: 1) Trees make mowing more difficult, 2) Tall canopy trees don’t make much in the way of pretty flowers, 3) Homeowners are paranoid about falling branches, 4) Trees interfere with utilities, 5) Trees create yard waste. 6) Trees shade out grass. Etc., etc….

But they’re a natural aesthetic and blocker of the merciless summertime UV death rays! So I will continue working with nature for the perks, instead of focusing on the negatives. I also want to expand the hosta patch, and that requires more shade. So I present to you, the Japanese maple:

Okay, maybe it’s not a true native, but neither are the honeysuckle. It’ll work. I speak for the trees, dammit!

–Simon

Nature will Try to Kill You, or Sometimes Just Want Fed

Of course, sometimes it will try to kill you because it wants food. Other times, however, it will ask nicely.

Take a gander

Such was the case when, doing some gardening, I was approached by a trio of ducks who then sat down and stared at me expectantly. But as I don’t normally walk around with duck chow in my pocket, I had to disappoint. Sensing a lack of forthcoming food, they wandered off.

But then they found my sump drainage line. More a retaining pool than anything, it had remained full with the amount of recent rain. And conveniently located next to that is the bird feeder, which always has seed beneath it, dropped by their messier cousins.

Satiated, they bed down for an afternoon nap.

We now have a flock of neighborhood ducks who, after being fed, decided this was a good neighborhood to live in. This is now The Year of the Duck.

Conversely, it’s also The Year of the Bees. I haven’t been stung in years, but a honey bee must have got itself stuck in my boot. Here’s the part where nature will also try to kill you.

Beware nature.

–Simon

Mushrooms (Part 4)

In what appears to be a mushroom theme as of late, here’s a newcomer I haven’t seen before. AI has made identification significantly easier now, taking some of the fun out of the search. Can’t stop what’s coming, I suppose.

Anyway:

Peziza vesiculosa

They grow in nutrient-rich mediums, such as this layer of mulch.

They’re also apparently inedible. Oh well.

–Simon