No, not a concealed carry license, although that would be appropriate. I speak instead of America’s 250th anniversary.
Outside a momentary “oh that’s neat” thought, I didn’t see much in the way of gushing over this momentous occasion. Unlike the Bicentennial, which Boomers constantly talked about in a way that compared it to Woodstock, this event went by as more or less a standard holiday. I assume this is because younger generations are alive for it, which removes the “I was there for it and you weren’t” retro-FOMOism bit. Still, a few found the time to complain about events being more drone-heavy, with tech starting to supplant explosives. Remember when more people were killing themselves with fireworks and causing massive property damage? Those were the days. We were a tougher generation.
A lack of skin grafts notwithstanding, here’s some photos of the Easement Acres celebration:
Product stickers I’ve received, place on my cooler. Capitalism! America!
Burgers!
Family!
Drones!
Not a firework, but a road flare. Because I never lit one before and it seemed like a good excuse to use one.
When I was a child, I had the credit score of a child. Now that I’m grown, I see through an iPhone darkly. Because it was in night mode. I was also squinting angrily in frustration.
One friggin point from maximum? That hardly matters, but it’s taunting me simply from an OCD standpoint.
As one with years in the credit industry, I’m very familiar with peoples’ delusions about their own credit worthiness. Underwriting for the mass public, especially in the retail credit realm, is telling. Most people are either largely ignorant or completely lacking self-awareness. The number of times “I have perfect credit!” was shouted at me from someone with a FICO in the 300s was disturbingly common. So common that it became a meme amongst my call center cohorts.
Fortunately I’ve moved on from customer-facing roles. And in the interim, a number of governmental regulations have been implemented that force additional transparency for the consumer. So I hope that the confused masses are taking opportunities from the present availability of information to better understand their own credit scores.
Still though, even as one associated with the industry, the scoring model remains mystical. So naturally, I consulted AI. Here’s what it had to say:
If your credit score is one point below the maximum (for example, 849 instead of 850 on many FICO models), it’s usually because the scoring model has found some tiny imperfection or simply because the algorithm doesn’t hand out the absolute maximum very often.
Common reasons include:
You still have active credit accounts. Oddly enough, having and using credit perfectly can sometimes score a point or two lower than having an idealized profile.
One inquiry in the last year or two. A recent mortgage, auto loan, or credit card application can shave a few points.
A non-zero balance reporting. Even if you pay cards in full every month, one card may report a small balance before the statement closes.
Credit mix isn’t mathematically perfect. The model may prefer a certain combination of revolving and installment accounts.
Average age of accounts. Even excellent profiles can be a point or two shy if some accounts are relatively newer.
Model quirks. Credit scores are statistical models, not grades. Sometimes two nearly identical consumers will differ by a point or two for reasons that aren’t obvious.
In conclusion, it would appear that a perfect credit score is nearly impossible to achieve. So it is with much regret that I must say to all my former interlocutors in consumer credit that, unfortunately, it’s unlikely that you ever had, or ever will have, perfect credit.
And not just the inevitable dings and scratches that seem to magically appear on a new car. No, I babied this thing, providing it a variety of speeds and RPMs, always staying within the recommendations except for a couple highway merging episodes where an old geezer chose potential death by truck collision rather than find the accelerator.
Ah, 1000 miles exactly.
Maybe I’ll celebrate by engaging its sport mode and flooring it.
Okay, no I probably won’t do that. But I could. And that alone feels fantastic. May she survive the kid’s driving lessons.
To be clear, I don’t consider vehicle registration plates, or even VINs, to be PII. If someone wanted to hunt me down with nefarious intent, a simple white pages search would probably be sufficient. This is also my personal blog, not a Reddit post, so very little hostility lies herein. Ergo, I don’t take any pains to block these things out of my pictures. Besides which, chances are that if I anger someone with my vehicle, it’s going to be while driving, in which case the offendee would be able to see it anyway.
Why the disclaimer? Because I wanted to post my vanity plates:
Is it elitist to agree to an additional $50/year charge for these? Maybe. But it’s a reasonable cost for minor self-gratification. In the end, it’s the little things.
Feminists often don’t acknowledge the exploitation of men. The assumption that men have always possessed personal agency is in direct opposition to most of our history. Most men did not get to choose their social status or career options. Most men were expected to conform to predefined values and obligations – same as women. I’d even go so far as to suggest that the rift in egalitarianism was fairly recent. When modern western society shifted towards one of individual autonomy, women were excluded – a social problem which has, on paper anyway, since been addressed.
Of course, what’s written and what’s practiced are two different things. And while legal obligations such as, say, equal opportunity in the workforce be enforced – which are dependent upon everyone playing by the rules, shouldn’t so too certain social obligations be governed? A woman is judged by her domestic competence. And men are judged by their physical abilities and willingness to suffer physical injury. Why don’t we as a people change these?
Because they supersede civil law. They long predate civilization. They remain the foundation to our survival as a species in those early days, which paved the way for common law, prior to civil law. I don’t think they can ever be changed. They’re part of who we are.
Point being: as a man who lacks economic and political means, I’m trapped in an exploitative system too.
So it was that 10 years ago I willingly agreed to be the functional mass of man flesh required to maintain an estate…for 10 years. My premonition at the time was that age and injury would compound to ultimately end my usefulness as a man after that timeframe. Such a prediction has turned out to be surprisingly accurate. I’m gradually phasing into a period of needing more hired help, and becoming incapable of tasks which formerly were straightforward.
And one such task is moving heavy objects. In this particular case – laundry machines to the basement! Moving these machines was always a bit of a struggle, but no Herculean effort. Then Liz’s new wash machine arrived. It’s the first front-loader we’ve ever had, and as it would turn out, significantly heavier than top-loaders. Its specs weigh in at 217lbs. And the all-steel appliance dolly we borrowed was 50-70lbs. That’s really damn heavy, especially considering that the bottom step of the basement is narrower than laundry machines, requiring one to lift them over the stair ledge on the final push.
We managed it, but I’m paying the price. Next time, younger men are needed.
They’re also entertaining to watch!
Of course, this will be 10 years this summer, at which point I might irreparably break anyway. At least my promise will be fulfilled.
