Mr. Once-Ler

The Christmas tree is down.

I spoke previously of the cursed tree that wouldn’t hold ornaments and gave me hives.  We’ve since blamed it for a shared allergy-turned-sinus-infection that’s turned the house into a mass of hacking, spitting, and overall generally miserable group of barely-animate skulking human flesh.  So after Liz packed up the ornaments and I the lights, I decided upon a solution more efficient than lugging the thing through the house once more.  I would take my revenge upon the arboreal abomination and in the process use a power tool.  How manly is that combo: violent revenge and power tools? …even if it was the reciprocating saw– AKA the small penis saw aforementioned.

Mua HAHAHAHAHA!
And out the window
Even with the wider hose, the needles clogged up the new shop vac too
Someone got yelled at for getting in the way

I plan to institute a new holiday: Christmas Tree Burning Day.  It will be held on the first weekend day that it isn’t unbearably cold.  I find that appropriate, seeing as the tree itself is a take on the pagan yule log thing (and it totally is, despite having heard ex post facto attempts to explain the tree’s origins in Christianity).

Arbor Ignis!

–Simon

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