Category: Nature

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Chickens Don’t Live in the Woods

How many times have we been told that human attention spans are getting shorter and they’re even shorter than that of a goldfish’s? I don’t know how that was calculated, but I’m guessing it’s one of those silly bits of “knowledge” that gets passed around, yet no one verifies. Like old glass being amorphous in nature, which is why farmhouses have ripply windows.

Maybe it’s getting harder to focus on a singular task, collectively. But where’s the reference point? I remain skeptical, but for the sake of entertaining the theory, I’ll give a potential example: hunting. Memories of my youth recall excitement with lots of game and running through brush after rabbits with my dad. Last time we went together, however, it ended with him picking mushrooms and me sifting through the fields identifying wild carrots. So maybe it’s true. Or maybe there just isn’t as much wild game anymore.

Whatever the case, a day in the woods now capitalizes on all nature has to offer. It is no longer an adventure with a singular objective. And as such, my father is now a mushroom forager.

There’s one in particular he seeks out: Chicken of the woods. Because, in his words, they’re edible and highly unlikely to be mistaken for any other type of mushroom (i.e. unlikely to be confused with a mushroom that causes catastrophic renal failure). Plus, there’s the coolness factor.

And his last excursion was very successful, so he brought some down. They’ve been in the freezer long enough for me to forget about them, but a recent freezer cleanout revealed the forgotten bounty. It was time to give them a try.

In their raw form, tossed into a saucier to dehydrate.
And a mild cheese bechemel.
And noodles.

And I must agree: it does resemble chicken meat, especially in texture. Flavor was mild, not so much like good chicken, but more like Tyson-brand cheap chicken. Worth the grab for a distracted mind when no squirrels are out. It might not be meat, but it’s still a good find. Thanks Dad!

–Simon

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Milkweeds and Monarchs

Despite my sister’s and hairstylist’s grumblings at my continued use of synthetic fertilizers and inorganic pesticides (hey, I still live in the suburbs, all right?), it is possible to strike a balance with desirable native species. And after several failed attempts to germinate milkweed seeds, I instead bought a plant, which then proceeded to spread by seeding itself throughout my hosta patch. Life finds a way, right?

And with it came the monarch butterflies. Always happy to see them.

After stripping this particular plant of leaves, it disappeared. Try as I might, I can never find their chrysalises…chrysali? Whatever.

So I’m doing my part, okay!? More pollinators!

–Simon

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Attack of the Arcus

It was a dark and stormy…afternoon. Such is the whim of the Midwestern climate gods. I’ve seen worse, but I’m never one to underestimate the atmosphere.

Especially when its associated cloud formations are so dramatic.

Behold the arcus!

Fortunately, no tornadoes accompanied it this time.

–Simon

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Pollinator Patch

I don’t buy this “pollinators are dying off” panic. There’s certainly no shortage of documentaries crying out over Colony Collapse Disorder with our commercial honey bees and how our food supply is in peril as a result. But first of all, our largest agricultural crops here in the US are maize and wheat – both of which are pollinated by wind – followed by soybeans and potatoes, which are self-pollinating and propagated through cuttings, respectively. And two – honey bees aren’t native to North America – they were imported from Europe. Our most important native pollinating bee here is the bumble bee, which doesn’t suffer from CCD (although they are experiencing population declines in urbanized areas, but so is every species displaced by human development). What we’re really whining about is the peril of beekeepers’ livelihood and their co-conspirators – the cash crops that rely on non-native pollinators because they themselves aren’t native, like almonds and apples. Interestingly, bumble bee hives have been commercialized, but no one talks about them because they aren’t as cute and they don’t make large amounts of honey.

The real problem is the ubiquitous use of residential pesticides, but that seems to be tapering off, at least in my own neighborhood. People are starting to show reluctance in trading lawn grubs for lymphoma, I’m guessing. I mean, I haven’t taken a poll or anything, so this is strictly observational. I don’t see nearly as many lawn care companies dumping chemicals on grass, and there are more young families. And there are tons of bees in my gardens (YoY informal personal measurements (hey – I’m in finance)). So progress, I think.

And here to help them along, I have dedicated a patch of my personal greenspace to benefit them! I offer up last year’s squash patch, which didn’t turn out too well. Too close to the greenbelt I think, and the deer helped themselves. So now it’s repurposed, with a custom sign to boot! Anniversary gift from Liz.

Right now it’s just a bunch of weeds, since the rabbits ate all my intentional plants before the grass filled in. But we’ll see how it goes and adjust the seed accordingly. If nothing else, the rabbits are choosing it over my cucumbers, so either way it’s a win.

For the bees!

–Simon