Category: House

I’m not sure if we’re going for a roadside shanty theme, but our growing string light setup is certainly more pleasant to look at from afar than the standard suburban system of single-bulb external illumination.  The overlapping fields of small-lumen bulbs provide a less invasive experience to the human eye, which I’m finding quite superior to everyone else’s practice of buying the brightest bulbs available to replace their standard garage and patio fixtures.

These are people who’ve forgotten how to use their outdoor space, and in an act of suburban paranoia, take crime-reduction advice to an extreme.  Yes, illuminating your entire property with theater stage lights will indeed make any criminals visible, but someone still has to see the criminal to know he’s there, and that system relies on other people in the neighborhood.  But with lights so bright now, I’m gradually planting bushes and constructing barriers to block those critical views.  You might have sufficient light to land helicopters, but now no one can see your yard to report crime, including you, because you’re inside.

Also I hate you now, because you’re making my own outdoor space less relaxing.

But enough of the grumbling.  Here’s our new deck lights!

It does make things a little cozier.  The prior lights were strung along the eaves, but the effect was a backlight that brought the deck in rather than inviting its full space.  I’m looking forward to their shining through the hydrangeas.

But waste not!  The old lights got a renewed purpose on our front porch.

Both sets are on light-sensing timers, so bonus in that I don’t have to remember to turn on lights for delivery services either.

All in all, their aesthetics might suggest rustic homeliness, but I’ll take the alternative to the typical sterile prefab over-lit house theme in these here parts.

Also I make good crab cakes.

–Simon

I like the concept of naming one’s home, but never fully jumped on board with the idea.  And I think it comes down to the fact that the names fail to recognize the place itself.  Instead, when I hear someone mention a named plot of private property, it’s for the sake of status.  Such is the case with celebrity locales, HOA neighborhoods, crappy apartments that try to sound better than they are, and sports arenas (which are really just sponsor plugs).  Sometimes small businesses choose a name that reflects the space, but more often opt for a more descriptive name which references what that business does.

So how would I choose a name for my small estate?

In order to avoid making it about me, I should refrain from explaining what I do with the property in the name.  Our love for dogs prompted some cutesy thoughts, such as “Whippet’s Run” or “Feisty Fields”.  But, the dogs are transitory inhabitants.  Also, we’re a somewhat sarcastic family.  The name should have a bit of snark, and reference what will always be here, devoid of the goofy romance with which people try to make you believe that they live in a British cottage overlooking Dover.  No, this is a contemporary abode in a neighborhood with well-funded public amenities, and the standard homeowner/municipality friction that always accompanies such developed areas.  The name should allude to that fact.

It needs to be an honest name with snark that only calls out what the property itself is and the type of place in which it resides.

Welcome to “Easement Acres.”  Call before you dig.

–Simon